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1/05/03
 
Hey Peepz,
 
What's up? I decided that I had accidently saved some of my updates, and some of em were pretty darn funny, so I put em up here. They're below this one. I'll keep adding updates until this becomes a huge, nightmarious diary thing! lol.
 
Well, today I went to Chinatown (downtown Chicago) and had a good time with my mom's side of the family. We all had fun. I had a lot of rice, and tried a bunch of stuff. Gotta love Chinese cooking! Jim, you were right! That stuff was delicious!
 
We all gave out presents and stuff. It was cool.
 
I have skiing during a barmitzvah ceremony. I feel terrible, but I had signed up for it before I had signed up for the 'bar. I'm going to the party, but I feel kind of guilty. Oh well, I hope he undestands. :o) The camp's gonna be skiing in Wisconsin for like, the entire day....it's gonna be FUNNNN!!!!
 
We're going glow-in-the-dark golfing soon! I'm so excited! The 11th I think. It's gonna be awesome!
 
-Sara-

Hey peepz,

Sup? Ohmygod, today was like...totally weird! everything was funked up.

We didn't exactly have school. We all went to the building that we call school and everything---but...still! We had this P.O.P (positive option program) today. It was really weird. ALL DAY. We got free breakfast (OJ and a bagel wif creem cheese) an' free lunch (pizza and a coke). Okay, I had OJ.
I'm happy. Alright? <<<shut up nicole....lol>>>

So we talked and did a bunch of stuff like talk about how drugs and alcohol is bad for you and everything. I think this was better than the other things that we've had before.

<<<Zach---you RAN into the tree, not walked. Either that, or the tree was just smart. haha! sucker.>>>

Okay people, SHUT UP ZACH! Seriously, the twizzlers LOOKED like forks, ok? <<<SHUT UP ZACH! lol>>>

SARA, I AM NOT A PREP!
SARA, I AM NOT A ... WHATEVER ELSE YOU CALLD ME! lol

Okay...let's see...

*grin* One dude kept looking at me. And YES, I do see you! Haha. LOL. Well, then again...I was lookin at you too----rofl. WE ARE BOTH CAUGHT RED HANDED!

Okay, what else.

Jennie, I'm NOT MAD AT YOU! Breathe girl!

She seez things right before she falls asleep. Everythings like MOVING! <<<lol Jacob.>>>

<<< MOO! Nice pantz Ava! ;) >>>

<<< Interded. Haha Lizzard (an a little haha to brett. you still suck) >>>


''I'm Stupid'' Signs  
Stupid people should have to wear signs that just say, "I'm
Stupid."
That way you wouldn't rely on them, would you? You wouldn't ask them
anything. It would be like, "Excuse me...oops, never mind. I didn't see
your
sign."

    It's like before my wife and I moved. Our house was full of boxes
and
there was a U-Haul truck in our driveway. My friend comes over and says
"Hey, you moving?" "Nope. We just pack our stuff up once or twice a
week to
see how many boxes it takes. Here's your sign."

    A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we
pulled
his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big 'ol stringer of bass and
this
idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch all them fish?" "Nope â
talked 'em
into giving up. Here's your sign."

    I was watching one of those animal shows on the Discovery Channel.
There
was a guy inventing a shark bite suit. And there's only one way to test
it.
"Alright Jimmy, you got that shark suit on, it looks good... They want
you
to jump into this pool of sharks, and you tell us if it hurts when they
bite
you." "Well, all right, but hold my sign. I don't wanna lose it."

    Last time I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of those
side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks out, looks at my
truck,
looks at me, and I SWEAR he said, "Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist.
Said,
"Nope. I was driving around and those other three just swelled right up
on
me. Here's your sign."

    We were trying to sell our car about a year ago. A guy came over to
the
house and drove the car around for about 45 minutes. We get back to the
house, he gets out of the car, reaches down and grabs the exhaust pipe,
then
says, "Darn that's hot!" See? If he'd been wearing his sign, I could
have
stopped him.

    I learned to drive an 18 wheeler in my days of adventure. Wouldn't
ya
know I misjudged the height of a bridge. The truck got stuck and I
couldn't
get it out no matter how I tried. I radioed in for help and eventually a local cop shows up to take the report. He went through his basic questioning..ok..no problem. I thought sure he was clear of needing a sign...until he asked "So..is your truck stuck?" I couldn't help myself! I looked at him, looked back at the rig and then back to him and said "No, I'm
delivering a bridge... here's your sign."

10 Ways to Annoy Cops 
 
Say, "Damn, officer, you must have been going fast to keep up with me!"
 
When he approaches you, stare at his gut and say, "Hmmm. I thought cops had to be physically fit."
 
Sway and ask if his bulletproof vest protects him from projectile vomiting.
 
Lie on the ground and ask him to draw your outline in chalk.
 
Throw his nightstick and tell the police dog to fetch it.
 
 
Ask him if you can use his pepper spray to spice up your pizza.
 
 
Tell him you wanted to be a cop, but decided to graduate high school instead.
 
 
When he asks you to walk the line, "Riverdance" instead.
 
 
Instead of pleading the 5th amendment, plead the 13th or 16th.
 
 
When he asks for your license, say, "Oh sure, officer, can you hold me beer for a sec?

---------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Hey peoplz,

Suppy? Sorry I hvnt emailed you peepz l8ly! I've been buzy updating my crappy websites (yeah, I have TWO!) lol. So anyway, I'm back!!!! Haha for those of you who hate me! ;)

Science was cool...we took a test, and notes, and some fun stuff. I failed the test, I just know it. My intelligence is ZERO!

In photog I'm really excited, we get to develop our film! I'm just kinda mad cuz I can't do it cuz u need 2 hands. SO not fair...

In math I like, killed Motta! She called me "Bingo'z Girl" okay, don't ask. It's an insult, ok? So I threw a little fuzzy book at her as a joke. She ducked, and it hit her in the eye. Her contact EXPLODED in her EYE and so she was bleeding for a little while. Yeah man, I'm not violent! *rolls eyes*
<<<There's a lesson to ya!>>

In gym I was kinda late. Oopzies! I didn't have to play basketball which was KINDA sad...but not really. I shot baskets while I waited for the period to end. I got 10 baskets, plus the other ones that weren't in a row.  :)
<<<Norma, you're good! U just need some practice! U got 4, that's still coolio!>>>

In social studies, Mrs. Levi wanted to kill me. :) She loves me, SOOOOO much! Seriously, I think she might not like me...but whatever. It's SCHOOL, Sara. GOD! LOL.
 
<<<Zach, u keep lookin at me. Is dere ketchup on my
face or summin?>>>

Guess what happened 2 me? My lunch exploded. It didn't just like, get ruined. It like, EXPLODED! Like, BOOM! Not splat. BOOM!!!!!  <<<LOL.  YOUR LUNCH HAS BEEN BOMBED BY THE DEVIL!!!>>>

In literature we did...reading an stuff. Study guide. Fun junk! :) <<<CHEESY MOUSE! haha liz>>>

In English we did like...dude....um...those picture thingys! I've got this neat one. BASEBALL ALL DA WAY BABY! <<<LOL. Zack, ur weird...those "horny" sounds u make when passin me by, freakin me out man!>>>

In French we did some stuff on verbs. TOO MUCH INFO!!!! <<<We're sorry, but your brain has officially DIED>>> <<<Rachel...I HAVE YOUR PENCIL!!! j/k
lol>>>

Chorus tomorrow. <<<yeech motta, scary!!>>>

Leigh, Liz...Sarah...you peoplez are SCARY! <<<I'm just not the hugging kind of perso... *LEIGH ATTACHES HERSELF TO SARA* um...ok? haha leigh!>>>

Liz, it wasn't THAT funny....*FART*....*BIG HUG*...damn, what's that SMELL?!?!?!? <<<haha lizzard!>>>

MELISSA! omg, u FELL into the hole. now THAT was funny...remember? at recess? u like, landed in the snow-covered tree stump thingy? Damn was that hilarious... too bad the tree wasn't there...now THAT would be weird...

Alrighty peepz! Ciao!

-Sara-

~~A PRAYR TO DIE~~
When I die, I want to go peacefully  like my grandfather did, in his sleep----not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

<<<<THIS UPDATE WRITEEN/TYPED ON 12/04/02 aka YESTERDAY>>>>

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